Friday, March 1, 2013

musings on this life from a giant hearted, cancer surviving yogini





That afternoon after the mammogram, I have a massage session with the magical Hannah at the Three Oaks Academy, which is a marvelous massage school.  

The woman who runs it is a friend of mine, Susan Stockton.  She has had me be the case study for one of her exceptional students to learn RBT, restorative breast therapy. http://www.threeoaksacademy.com

RBT is a therapy that was created here at the clinic to work with women who are dealing with breast cancer or…  reconstructive surgery.  It encourages lymphatic drainage, miofacial release and helps minimize and heal the trauma to the body and the spirit after such an experience. 

My first meeting with Susan was 2 days after I had my first mammogram and we have been on this ride together ever since.

The three oaks is located in a beautiful old craftsman style house in downtown Boise (211 West State Street).
Hard wood floors, plants and natural light everywhere. 

Susan’s gentle giant healing canine, sugar bear, always stretched out on the floor in front of the fire place. 

One of my favorite artists, Anna Ura, has a gorgeous oil painting of stark winter trees hanging over the mantle. www.annaura.com

It is a place of healing. 

It is full of love and caring that is deeply rooted in strong foundational knowledge and experience, as well as spiritual understanding and power.

After hugging everyone in hugging distance, I am led to a therapy room. 

Natural light slips in thru the old leaded glass windows, diffused by the white wooden plantation blinds… dark wood… plants… candles… beautiful art work… an angel image on an old rough piece of barn wood hangs on the wall. 

Soothing music playing , the massage table warm and inviting with flannel sheets.

I undress and slide under the blankets listening to the birds outside in the trees and watching the light play across the sage green walls. 

It is warm, safe, inviting and an infinitely healing environment.


Hannah (aka Redd Foxit) enters the room and instantly there is a sense of calm, of caring and of intention. 

She holds my feet to connect to my energy before she goes any further. 

Then she moves to my head for some gentle cranial sacral work. 

Then as she as ready to do the RBT work, she asks if she might uncover one side of my chest to do the work. she asks.

This work consists of gentle, yet powerful pressing with the fingertips along the upper collar bone and upper chest area to stimulate lymphatic drainage. 

Then as she begins to take the chest wall with both hands and lifting it up and pulling slightly, like you were handling pizza dough or the back of a basset hounds neck. 

This repetitive lifting and gentle pulling, feeling the muscles “unstick” from the ribs and bones. 
 
There is nothing aggressive about it. 

If feels like she is up to her elbows, reaching down into the depths to pull your traumatized inner layers up to the surface. 

To reunite you with the whole of your body.

In yoga we talk about the five koshas.
The energetic layers of our bodies:
*the food body or physical body
*the pranic or breath/energy body
*the mental body
*the astral body
*the bliss body      

This work feels like it is pulling off the serran wrap that smashes the koshas together when they have been thru a trauma like surgery. 

I felt that I was being pulled up to the surface to bring light and breath and expansion to where there was constriction and fear.



She works both sides and when she is done you feel like a three dimensional being again. 

That space is being made for healing to continue to take place… to mend… to move forward.

I generally pass out into some kind of blessed out shavasana during my sessions with her. 

When I leave I feel restored and revitalized. 

I am blessed that i see her once a week and each session I feel it move the toxic sludge out of my body, my tissue, my heart.

I feel in my heart that there is a way to integrate these experiences and to create a more healing, caring and personal environment as women walk this road. 

Not one side or the other… but a bridging of the two. 

It is in that bridging together that real healing on all levels can take place…

… and isn’t that what health and wellness is all about?




The Return



Some day, if you are lucky...
 
you’ll return from a thunderous journey
trailing snake scales, wing fragments
and the musk of Earth and moon.

Eyes will examine you for signs
of damage, or change
and you, too, will wonder
if your skin shows traces

of fur, or leaves,
if thrushes have built a nest
of your hair, if Andromeda
burns from your eyes.

Do not be surprised by prickly questions
from those who barely inhabit
their own fleeting lives, who barely taste
their own possibility, who barely dream.

If your hands are empty, treasure less,
if your toes have not grown claws,
if your obedient voice has not
become a wild cry, a howl,

you will reassure them. We warned you,
they might declare, there is nothing else,
no point, no meaning, no mystery at all,
just this frantic waiting to die.

And yet, they tremble, mute,
afraid you’ve returned without sweet
elixir for unspeakable thirst, without
a fluent dance or holy language

to teach them, without a compass
bearing to a forgotten border where
no one crosses without weeping
for the terrible beauty of galaxies

and granite and bone. They tremble,
hoping your lips hold a secret,
that the song your body now sings
will redeem them, yet they fear

your secret is dangerous, shattering,
and once it flies from your astonished
mouth, they–like you–must disintegrate
before unfolding tremulous wings.

~The Return by Geneen Marie Haugen
~Art by Charles Frizzell

Disseminating Moon Phase - Moon in Libra/Scorpio



Let's see if I can untangle the nest of brambles that is today's energy.

Let's take them one by one:

Fight or Flight: Today brings circumstances or events where we will need to choose between fighting (directly engaging something/ someone head on) and fleeing (mentally retreating to reason or think things out).

Circumstances and events may be taking us out of our comfort zone or range of experience/expertise.

There's "battle energy" in play, so don't go about unguarded.

Use the technique of visualizing the shaft of light surrounding you, moving with you.

We will need to stalk this energy or it will stalk us.

Be aware.

Above all, don't pretend to be more than you are.

Humility goes along way today because it is stealthy.

Crazytown: The crazy is likely to come out today and it involves religious/spiritual motifs.

"Religious ideation" and "messiah complexes" are present to varying degrees.

This runs the spectrum of people believing they have all the answers and are totally in control of matters to bizarre cult-like behavior.

Chiron Point Persists: The Moon will oppose the Chiron Point (see yesterday's post in the Archives) while Venus and Neptune continue close conjunction at the Chiron Point as the Sun and Chiron continue their close conjunction.

That's about as "Chiron" as we could get. Chiron energy is self-sabotaging, among other things (it has wonderful teaching and healing abilities as well).

But with the battle energy that is also present, we could do real damage to ourselves today.

In ancient mythology, Chiron was the teacher of great warriors like Hercules, Achilles, and other heroes.

So if we find ourselves in a theatre of battle (the theatre of the mind or the theatre of the world around us)…

… we need to direct our efforts outward and not inward.

Chiron wounded his foot with a poison arrow he made for Achilles (the Achilles heel).

Wise owls here at the Oracle Report are familiar with shooting arrows.

Shoot them where they belong and not at yourself.

Watch your step and hold the rail.

Neptune/Pisces rules the feet and we are under heavy influence by Neptune and Pisces. (I could write a disseration on transiting Neptune conjunct the natal Sun in Pisces with Chiron Point ascendant. I know of what I speak.)

Hidden within today's nest of energy is a crowning jewel, so please don't mistake this report to negate anything beautiful today.

The Venus-Neptune conjunction continues to bring out the highest forms of spirit and real-life manifestations of our inner world.

Find the beauty within the day.

Let's not forget what is truly important: We are having a love affair with the goddess embodied as the planet and joining her on the grand stage of her creative experiment of humanity.

http://www.oraclereport.com/



From Quantum Emotional Clearing:

Today's tapping affirmation: (tap with 3 fingers in between the eyebrows.

This connects to Governing Channel/Vessel Meridian point.

The channel enters both the Heart and the Brain, thus establishing a pathway link between the two main organs understood as the residence of spirit)

"Even though life can be overwhelming at times and it feels like I am juggling more than I can handle, I am free to create positive connections to Mother Earth.

I choose to be free, strong and capable. I understand that balance is in a constant state of re-adjustment and I create my boundaries wisely.

I choose to release and eliminate the need to always be in control and I decide, right now, to go with the natural flow of the Universe.

I release all forms of self-judgment and negative thinking patterns and I create my Universe to attract only the best for my life and World.

*So be it.
*Let it be done.
*And it is so.

Thank you." (breath in 3x with eyes closed.)